SA Corona Virus Online Portal Logo



The difference is day and night!

Is there incentive from the Proteas point of view to lay it all out on the field in the 3rd test? –  A quick look at the motivational factor for Faf and his men…

  • A series white wash – IN AUSTRALIA!
  • Making History – IN AUSTRALIA!

Apart for the obvious mentioned above, this will also be the Protea’s first day night test – something I am personally not yet sold on, but let’s look and see. Day nights, in theory, makes absolute sense – Getting people to the ground after work: Getting the live viewers on TV up, etc. But the argument against, is that conditions from day to night differ so much that results will also be quite different. Take then into account the rich history of records that cricket holds over centuries and perhaps an option is not to call it test cricket – maybe a four-day format under a different brand?

The test starts next week Thursday and we can discuss the merits of the team then. First, let’s enjoy the series win with a bit of humour:

Q: What do you call an Aussie cricketer with 100 by his name?
A: A bowler.

Q: What do you call an Aussie who can hold a catch?
A: A fisherman

Q: What’s the difference between Cinderella and an Australian cricketer?
A: Cinderella knew when to leave the ball

Q: What do you call a world class Australian cricketer?
A: Retired.

Q: What do you call an Australian with a bottle of champagne in his hand?
A: A waiter.

The Australian bobsleigh team have asked the Aussie cricketers for a meeting. They want to know how they went downhill so fast.

Q: What’s the difference between an Aussie batsman and a formula one car?
A: Nothing. If you blink, you’ll miss them both.

Q: What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common?
A: Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q: What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?
A: The entire Australian innings.

Q: What do you call a cricket field full of Australians?
A: A vacant lot.

Q: What is the main function of the Australian coach?
A: To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

Q: Who spends the most time on the crease?
A: The woman who irons the Australian team’s cricket whites.

Q: Why don’t Aussie fielders need travel injections?
A: Because they never catch anything.

Q: What’s the Aussie version of a hat trick?
A: Three runs in three balls.

Q: What is the most proficient footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?
A: The walk back to the pavilion.

Q: What is the definition of optimism?
A: An Aussie batsman putting on sunscreen before going out to bat.

Q: What’s the Australian version of LBW?
A: Lost, Beaten, Walloped.

Q: Who has the easiest job in the Australian squad?
A: The guy who removes the red ball marks from the bats.

Q: What do you call an Australian who can handle a bat….
B: A vet

Q: Why are Australian cricketers cleverer than Houdini?
A: Because they can get out without even trying.

, , , ,

One Response to The difference is day and night!

  1. Peter Lucas 17 November 2016 at 1:23 pm #

    Hi Paul,

    Did you send your “definitions” to the Sydney Morning Herald – give them a dose of heartburn for a change