Sny drank uit

Posted on

Beste Paul

Na aanleiding van jou onlangse versoek dat ons jou van interessante gebeure en hoogtepunte in 2012 vertel. Wel, my hoogtepunt is dat my gesondheid hierdie jaar baie verbeter het.

Soos die meeste van ons in hierdie bedryf, is ek ook nie meer so jonk nie en begin die gesondheid ook nou maar sy probleme gee. Ook is my geheue nie meer wat dit was nie.

My dokter het egter aan die begin van die jaar vir my gesê, as ek ‘n lang gesonde lewe wil hê, moet ek drank uitsny.

Ek het nou amper 2 plakboeke vol prentjies.

As jy ook wil drank uitsny, kyk na Makro pamflette, hulle het die beste prentjies!!!

Groete.

Nick van Rensburg

A New Conspiracy

Have you noticed that stairs are getting steeper? Groceries are heavier. And, everything is farther away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was dumbfounded to discover how long our street had become!

And, you know, people are less considerate now, especially the young ones. They speak in whispers all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the same silent message until they’re red in the face! What do they think I am? A lip reader?

I also think they are much younger than I was at the same age. On the other hand, people my own age are so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend the other day and she has aged so much that she didn’t even recognize me.

I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I glanced at my own reflection. Well, REALLY NOW –even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!

Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days! You’re risking life and limb if you happen to pull onto the motorway in front of them. All I can say is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way I see them screech and swerve in my rear view mirror.

Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these days. Why else would they suddenly start labelling a size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no one notices? The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the same prank. Do they think I actually ‘believe’ the number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let myself weigh that much! Just who do these people think they’re fooling?

I’d like to call up someone in authority to report what’s going on — but the telephone company is in on the conspiracy too: they’ve printed the phone books in such small type that no one could ever find a number in there!

All I can do is pass along this warning:
WE ARE UNDER ATTACK!

PS: I am sending this to you in a larger font size, because something has happened to my computer’s fonts – they are smaller than they used to be.